We are now a community of 209! Thank you❤️

This newsletter is free and I don’t use paid advertising. I completely rely on organic growth through users who like my content and share it.

So, if you like today’s edition, please take a moment to share this newsletter on social media or forward this email to someone you know.

If this email was forwarded to you, you can subscribe here.

If you want to create a newsletter with Beehiiv, you can sign up here.

How To Avoid Pointless Arguments?

Okay, honestly speaking, this is a non-technical article. I am going a bit off subject here but at the same time, because arguments are so common everywhere, you can apply the tips that I will be giving to any situation where there can be disagreement - your workplace, a political rally, a family get-together, etc. Without further ado, let’s dive into it.

Let me first start with the reason. Why am I even bothered to write about this topic? With the advent of social media, information overload and echo chambers introduced by algorithms, our society is becoming increasingly divisive. Whether you see it on the internet amongst random strangers or in real life amongst your acquaintances, the quality of debate is reducing.

It feels like people don’t want to achieve anything through arguments. It’s always - “I have picked this side and I’m always right.”

It might work for subjective things like - “This is my favourite football team. It’s the best team in the world.” That’s just an opinion. There’s nothing to argue about here. Two people can choose two different teams and love their respective clubs as the best in the world.

But, let’s take a situation, where it does matter. In any country with democratic elections, the citizens of the country need to elect the right people into power. Debates, disagreements and arguments are necessary for a healthy democracy.

But if we end up giving the football treatment to political leaders and parties and end up choosing the wrong ones, who’s at a loss?

This is applicable everywhere. You need to have positive discussions with your manager to grow in your career. You need to argue well with your co-founder to make your startup a success. You need to debate about the right hotels within your budget to make your trip enjoyable for all.

How To Pick The Right Fights?

There are some factors that I always consider before even initiating an argumentative conversation:

• Existence of disagreement: Are I and the opposite party really in disagreement about the decision to be made? Have sides been picked? Or, are we just listing down options?

• Worth: Is it worth my time, health and money to have that argument?

• Narrowness: When people argue about one thing, it takes no time for another older disagreement to creep into the conversation. And then another, and another… Always make sure to argue about a specific topic to avoid making things endless.

• Result-oriented: Do all the parties involved in the debate want to achieve something? Do they actually want a resolution to the problem or are they just arguing for the sake of it?

How To Resolve A Disagreement Faster?

Once you know, that the argument is worth having, something specific can be achieved and a resolution can be reached, there are 3 more things that I find extremely important:

• Listen: Listening is an active process. To make a good case, you need to understand what the opposite party is trying to convey.

• Attack their strengths: Always go after what you think is the strongest point in their argument. If you shake the foundations, the rest of the argument collapses.

• Think like them: This is probably something your mind does without effort. We keep thinking about what our opponent will do while playing a sport, a video game, a corporate meeting, etc. to plan our next move better.

Ultimately, you end up with the resolution of any disagreement quickly.

Did you like this article? Anything that you’d like to comment? Feel free to reply.

Did you like today’s newsletter? Feel free to reply to this mail.

This newsletter is free but you can support me here.

I’d be happy to connect on Medium, LinkedIn and X.